Sleep Deprivation, Isolation, and Depression - Oh My!

I took my kids outside to play on Tuesday afternoon.  It was a busy night - lots of homework - and Princess had girl scouts.  But it was also 65 degrees and sunny!  It is hard to live 1000 miles away from home, but on days like this, when Iowa is blizzarding and Texas is beautiful, it's a little easier.

We live on a pretty busy street, but the neighborhood directly behind us is on a cul-de-sac and, since we know so many friends on that street, we have no qualms whatsoever about heading over there to play.  We bring bikes, scooters, and band-aids because invariably someone gets a boo-boo.  The kids ride their bikes in the street, and the adults watch for cars.  If we see one, we all yell "CAR!" and the kids know to race over to the sidewalk until the car has passed.

My friend, AB's mom, my new neighbor friend, K, and I were all sitting in our strategically placed camping chairs so we could have a good view of our collective eight kids and chat at the same time.  We weren't there long when another mom came walking down the street to join us.

Seeing her brought back a lot of memories.  She was me 6 years ago.  She was walking her 2 1/2 year old daughter around and carrying a 6 month old, and she looked tired even though she was trying her best to not to.  She was smiling and chatting, but I could see it in her eyes.  So, I asked her how her baby was sleeping.

She laughed and said "Not so good."

Her first child had been a perfect sleeper - not unlike Princess.  Princess slept through the night - we are talking 7:00PM-7:30AM - at 2 months old.  The 6-years-younger me and this new mom had both thought that it was because we were doing something right.  BEEP!  Wrong answer!

Along came child #2.  And it really doesn't matter that her second child was a little girl and mine was a little boy.  What mattered is that they were NOT good sleepers at 6 months of age.

6 months may not seem like that long of a time, but if you are not sleeping, it seems like forever!

So we chatted about this and instantly bonded the way moms do.  Motherhood is a sisterhood in and of itself.  And it is my firm belief that if we can help each other through the tough days, we will all be better for it.

She had not been out and about for a few days.

Have you ever been, (not exactly) trapped (but you know what I mean) with a baby and a toddler?  For several days in a row?  I have.  And it isn't pretty. 

When I was that 6-years-younger mom, there were weeks that would go by and I would not get out of the house except when DadOf4 took me out to eat on Friday night.  Yea, dumb I know.  But I was tied to nap schedules and feeding schedules and it was really, really hard to get of out of the house on my own with two kids. Those schedules are really good for the kids, but they are tough on mommies.

I never experienced Baby Blues right after the kids were born.  Or maybe I did and it just didn't last too long.

I did however experience depression and all of the guilt that goes along with it.  How can a new mom possibly be depressed?  She has that precious little baby and I was lucky enough to have a precious little baby and a toddler too.

It is simple math here people. 

Sleep Deprivation + Isolation = Depression.

I am a slow learner, but by baby #4, I finally got it.  It is important to do stuff that is good for me too even if it gets us off schedule and a nap is missed here and there.  Bottles are a good thing.  Pumping is not a sin and neither is formula!

I hope I helped that new mommy.  Knowing that you are not alone and taking isolation out of the equation goes a long way to combat depression.  So does getting sleep but that is not always possible. 

And so, we pushed homework back on a beautiful 65 degree, sunny day here in Texas and Duke skipped his afternoon nap. 

And we are all better for it!

Photostory Friday #1!

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

Princess and Prince!

Princess took this picture!




Pretty Swimming Hole!

We went swimming at a new swimming hole this morning! We left at 8:00 and got there around 9:00. Then we swam for a couple of hours and had a picnic lunch. What a fun morning!

Busy day with Friends!

Princess is all ready for her playdate in a dress from Aunt Icky!
The kids were a blur of dancing!

AB and Princess - dancing machines!

Time to play Mousetrap!

Princess and AB

AB's Mom and I worked out a great deal today! She watched Princess, Prince, and the Knight while I got groceries gloriously alone! Afterward, I picked up all four kids and they played over here for 4 hours so AB's mom could pack. They are flying out to see all of the grandparents tomorrow. The kids had a fun time playing Dance Party, Mousetrap, and Wii. They were pretty darn cute!

Fun at Kiddie Playland!

One of the nice things about living in a bigger city is the number of kid things there are to do. Today we headed out to Kiddie Playland, a pre-schoolers dream place! There were only 6 or 7 rides but they were neat and one of the rides was a real live pony ride! It was very hot today but it was dry so we headed out around 9:30 and called it a day around 11:00. Here are some pictures from the day!




<==Princess, Prince, and Knight with two of their best friends!








<==The Knight was not so sure he wanted to go on this yellow jeep!











<==The Princess was thrilled when she got to ride a real, live pony! This one was named Rancher!





<==I didn't know if I would get the Prince on a pony or not but he was ready, willing and able to ride this pony named Copper!

<==This is as far as the Knight got. He really really wanted to ride a pony like his big brother and sister, but he really really wanted to get down from the pony too. Wanting to get down from the pony won out.

<==The Princess and the Knight ended the day together on the airplanes!






<==The Prince was happy to get an airplane all to himself!

The Prince Has A Playdate!

The Prince had a play date today from 9:00AM until 12:30! One of our neighbors (the ones who invited us to swim at the YMCA last week) invited the Prince over to play with their 5 year old son. All reports of the play date have been positive! The Prince was said to have been polite, to have included his host's three year old sister, and to have eaten all of his lunch! This was a brand spankin' new experience for all of us, but no one took it harder than...the Princess.

Usually it is the Princess who gets to go places without the boys. She has gone to birthday parties, play dates, and school events without them. Usually the Prince is left behind. So, when it was the Prince who was invited and not her, she was pretty upset. Luckily, I had an activity already planned for this morning: shopping at the grocery store. (For those reading between the lines, that meant that I got to go grocery shopping with two kids instead of three! It was like having the morning off!)

The Princess was pretty content with her lot in life until we got home from the store. On the drive home she asked me if we could stop over and check on how the Prince was doing. The Princess is a smart cookie. She knew that if we checked in on him, she would get to play too. I had to say no to this one because we had to get the groceries out of Otis the Van and into the house.

After the groceries were put away, it was time to get lunch. The Prince was invited to have lunch at the play date, so this was yet another reminder to the Princess that she had been left out. She honestly could not make up her mind what to eat! She rarely has to have lunch without the Prince when she is at home. Their game is to go back and forth suggesting things to eat and then they make the decision together. She ended up not eating lunch until after the Prince came home because she could not make up her mind. The Knight had his customary Peanut Butter and Jelly.

When the Prince was delivered home from his play date, his friends stayed for about 45 minutes so I could catch up with their Mom and the kids could play. The Princess went bananas trying to get everyone's attention!

I think this was good for her. Her little world will be back to normal on Saturday when she is invited to a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese's without the boys. I think I will bring the Prince anyway though. Even though he will not be included in the party he can still play and I can get him his own little pizza.

Can you tell I was a younger sibling? I really feel for the Prince and I am glad that he had a chance to be Top Dog today.

Busy good day!

Wow! What a day! Normally I limit myself to one big activity a day but today I surpassed this by a mile. We got groceries today which is always a crapshoot. Today the Prince was a doll though and I didn't even have to bribe him! I did promise to take him to the park when we got home if he was good but I didn't actually buy him something. I don't like it when I do that anyway. So we left the house at 8:00 AM and we were home by 9:15. The boys watched Dora the Explorer (at the Prince's request, go figure!) while I brought in the groceries. MomOf2Boys had called while we were gone. We were going to meet her at the park but she suggested that we come over to her house instead because it had rained so much yesterday. I am glad she made the suggestion because even her lawn was a little wet. MomOf2Boys youngest was home. Her oldest is in Kindergarten so he was at school. The Prince and his friend, also 3 1/2, had a great time riding trikes. The Knight spent most of the time playing with a toy school bus and shouting for his brother to come back from riding trikes. MomOf2Boys and I had a nice chat and the boys had about 1 1/2 hours of fresh air and exercise. We headed home for lunch and naps. After the Princess arrived home from school, we received an invitation to go to ANOTHER neighbor's house to play. I brought the camera but didn't take any pictures. This neighbor is a stay-at-home-dad (SAHD) of a 5 year old boy and a 3 year old girl. Fun kids and my boys worship the 5 year old. They have a great backyard setup with a play scape, a teeter totter and lots of pea gravel. The kids had a blast. Their mommy (and my friend) came home around 5:00 so we walked the kids over to our house to continue the play date. My friend is a school Principal and quite fun to talk with. DadOf3 came home around 6:00 so we broke up the party and retired to our house to make supper and get baths. I gave the Princess hers and he gave the Prince and the Knight theirs. This may not sound fair but it is. The Princess is pretty particular. We have had a great day and I am close to getting 20,000 steps on my pedometer. I will let you know if I make it tomorrow. At 7:45, I have 18,332!